The hardest part of being a mom: balancing work life with mom life.
The constant worry, am I spending enough time with Liam or am I spending to much time focusing on my work? This is a constant struggle for me and I presume for many of you moms out there, especially when trying to start a business from the ground with a 10 month old. While he’s playing I am working, but should I be down there playing alongside him? I think all moms have had this feeling before, and I want to say that is normal. Still today, moms are believed to be the ones to nurture and raise the children, while men are believed to work. I do believe however in our culture today that is slowly changing as women take on more roles and start more businesses. Correct me if I am wrong, as a mom, you feel it’s your duties to raise your babies, so everything else has to get put on hold while your husband works. I am doing my best to show Liam as he grows up and learns from us, that women who work and own businesses are just as important as men who work. Growing up I watched and learned that most women stay home if they are able, while men go to work if you are married. For myself and my family, I want to raise Liam knowing women can work just as hard as the men of the world do. This is so important to me, because I have a lot of aspirations that I want to build and also be the best at my other full-time job, being a mother.
With that, comes drawing the line between working and spending time with Liam. It is crucial to me to watch Liam grow and play with him everyday because time really does fly by. (Like I blinked and here he is crawling around eating everything he can get his hands on.)
This is how I cope with the anxiety of feeling like I am focusing to much on myself and not enough on raising Liam.
1. I am doing this not only for myself, but to provide for Liam.
2. I work during nap time (when he sleeps for longer than 15 min).
3. I work after he goes to bed.
4. I know when he’s not with me, Nana & Grandma are taking good care of him.
5. I incorporate him into my work as much as possible.
6. I get on my computer beside him while I type. (Until he decides to help me type)
7. I enjoy working and providing for my family.
8. I know God has called me to do work.
9. MAMAS, BELIEVE IT OR NOT YOU STILL NEED A LIFE OUTSIDE YOUR CHILDREN. YOUR DREAMS STILL MATTER.
50/50 mom and work life is basically what I am running on. 50% work and 50% mom. Now this is when I am home with Liam, not when you work a full-time job. That’s understandable. With my own business and starting up at home, I try to work 50/50 so that all day I am not completely ignoring Liam but playing and interacting with him as well. I think it is essential for children today to watch their parents work so that way they can learn hard work ethic, but also to actually get on the ground and play with the combines and tractors.
Let me know if this way of thinking applies to you as a mother as well. I know when I first had Liam I thought it was my duties to focus solely on him and everything else I’ve ever wanted did not matter anymore because this was my job now. Part of that is so totally true, you do have a new full-time job, being a mother, but everything else still matters and believe it or not I am living proof along many other mamas, it is possible to have multiple full-time jobs when you are passionate about what you do.
I tell you what, S/O to all the stay at home moms also, because that job is probably one of the hardest full-time jobs I have ever had. If someone ever tells you staying home with your kids is not a full-time job, do not talk to those people, seriously. From experience staying home with one baby is so much harder than going to work everyday from 8-5. It is rough and brutal and deserves HIGH pay. I really do not know how you ladies do it and keep your sanity. For myself, I want to work, build a business, and stay busy. Being a full time stay at home mom, has never sounded ideal for me, and I honestly do not think I would survive. So go you full time mamas (and nanas out there). You all are the real MVPs.
Moms who are like me and moms who work full time, it is very hard finding a good balance between work and mom life, but just figure out what works best for you and your life. Spending time and being in the moment with Liam is very special to me and so is working to fulfill that spot in my life. Draw the line where it needs to go and work from that. 50/50 is what I try to work for when I am at home with Liam, if he is awake I try to be in the moment with him.
You’ve all watched some movie that displayed a mom who worked far more than being with her kids, and who shut their kids out of their life to work. Don’t be that mom, this is your most important full-time job after all.
Comparison is the death to all joy; the only mom you need to be better than, is the one you were yesterday.
xoxo,
Kylie